Resurrecting Goodbye

Last week was a rough one.

The days following the Resurrection should be joyful. Triumphant. The Light pierced the darkness. Saturday rose victoriously on Sunday.

That’s the thing about light though. It’s not the place for hiding.

I have pushed hard for a year. Pushed some feelings down knowing that they had to wait to grow into what God would have for them. Some emotions I pulled up by the roots, laid bare on the dissecting table and went at them with the knife of my pen. A few. Several were birthed through tears that fell in sheets of paper and were covered gently with glue to seal in the moment.

So after a year of laboring, and another round of Light slaying the darkness, I had to take inventory. What seeds were growing and what that should have been pulled out had actually gone to seed–creeping slowly into all the clean little patches of new life.

I laughed when I saw the word for Five Minute Friday. I realized it was completely appropriate and then promptly avoided it because of how real and tangible it was. The 3 gifts for April 16th? You guessed it, 3 hard eucharisteos.

The weeding and goodbye-ing is still sitting with me. The lists of gratitude are held close to the chest–like a royal flush waiting for its turn.


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